Some statements in this article are right some are not really applicable in my situation. I have two potential lover in the future trying to get me but I haven’t decided which one because thet need to show me something first and of course I don’t give those things they want. Suddenly both of them were pulling away and not gave much attention as before, that time I waited and even no clue at all what have had happened. I tried not to put any assumption and put blame on myself, tried to relax and had fun with friends. Two months, then I just shoot the questions to both. I don’t care, if they’re not interested please don’t block my door. “You okay? Are you not interested in me anymore? You mad at me or something?”.. One got angry and said that I am the one who becomes distant and not talking to him, in fact I was just giving him space. We had argument and he left. The other guy said sorry, he didn’t give any reason, he just said sorry and but coming back more to me, giving more attention bigger and sweeter than before. He said he feels wanted by me, and now I know which one to choose. So the point is just speak up and see his reaction. Let it naturally, if you mad and become uncomfortable just say it. Plenty fishes in the sea, with patients you will know that he’s the one. A feeling without pressure or hideous love game. Goodluck!
Here;s an interesting one and maybe I am being a brat but I'm going to ask anyway. Late October I started seeing this guy. I did everything wrong one the first date, but I din't care one bit because I honestly didn't find him to be great looking. Super nice, great dresser, good body, but different than I expected. Anyway, we went out again because if a guy seems to have most of the qualities I like, if I think he's super nice and cool, I'll give it a try. We sleep together on date 2 and again, I DON'T CARE that I probably should not have. He still wants to see me though. After date four, I decide I'm just trying to like the guy so I tell him I can't see him anymore. I don't say exactly why but that something is not there.He starts to ask why and then backs off (smart) and takes it like a gentleman.That was after like 2 weeks. The next day or two all I do is tell my friends about this and it occurs to me I'm thinking about him nonstop. So I text him and BAM! Back together, dating and having the best sex I have EVER had in my life. We text a lot, he intiates, I don'tact needy at all... It's nice, it's warm, it's sexy, it's just great. THEN... his mom dies. He has to leave town but he just keeps on texting me the whole time. Before that he even invited me into his own world at a ceremony he had to attend. Up to this point he says thing like when you meet so and so and things like that. While out of town, everything is still great and he says he doesn't want to dwell on his mom.I respect that so I don't push at all. Before he gets back he he says he needs to take me to his home town (a popular vacation destination). When he gets back I meet him but his flight was delayed so it's pretty late (not normal for us to do late night stuff like that). I even said if it's too late let's reschedule. He says no so I go. The next day is fine... texting blah blah blah, but the following day he seems to be distant. I do nothing. The next day, today, I text him first. He says he had a headache the day before but it's probably stress over deciding to leave an old job for a new one and a lawsuit he's in. He then tells me about it. But.... he definitely seems more distant than when his mom died, so I'm thinking am I just being a complete brat here or is he actually losing interest. It seems really obvious to me but I have recently decided I don't make excuses for a man's behaviour any more. If they want you, no matter the circumstances, you know it. what's your take? Feel free to completely call me out, if I am just being a big baby here. At this point, I actually do really like the guy. I wish he would say something like "I'm cray about you" or something but his actions up to this point have been great so saying words may be a bit much to expect less than 2 months in anyway. Either way, I just want to know if I should completely bail at this point because I hate this feeling!
Try not to jump right into another relationship straight away in a bid to make your ex jealous. I’m not saying ‘’don’t focus on yourself’’ but this is not the way to go about things as it only gives a negative message to your ex which may backfire if they do the same thing. so, what can you do to focus on yourself? You can start from appearance (new haircut, new clothes, get down to the gym, eat healthier, etc) keeping a good attitude and staying open-minded. Upgrade yourself with your outer appearance and inner attitude. Be the best version that you can be of yourself. If you’re really wanting to move on, then maybe you want to check out The Best Chat Up Lines to use on girls.
I have been with my bf for just over a year lived with him for just over 6 of those, it’s been great he’s really been open and honest about his feelings but for the past month or so I have noticed how much he has thrown himself into work (self employed so can do as little or much as he pleases) and so our time together has dwindled? I challenged him over this as I wanted to spend time with him doing nice things all the time getting “as soon as much jobs are all done” which could be anytime! I truly believe he was now starting his pulling away stage, I am now worried that I have ‘ran’ after him too much and made things much much worse by delaying his pulling away possibly even ensuring he has had enough and is ready to call it a day! Hes working away at the moment and before he went we had another petty argument in which I stupidly told him that we should have some space with no communication whilst hes away (I felt like I couldn’t do right for doing wrong) I’m scared I have ruined it completely now! I self blame quite a lot (past relationship issues) since away he has texted me and told me he is also to blame for these issues and that with time he’s sure we will be alright, Please help what should I do, what actions should I take? If this is pulling away, will he be able to return still or has this gone too far? He’s due home on Thursday, how do I allow him time in his man cave when we live together?
This part of the message serves as the test for your ex girlfriend. She can either accept your invitation to talk on the phone or decline it. If she accepts it then you can run around your house like a crazy man full of excitement. If she declines it don’t take it personally. She may be busy at that particular moment or you may not have built up enough attraction yet. It just means you have a little more work to do.
Seriously though, if you see any book, product or article that guarantees that it can get you your ex back 100% of the time you should stop and realize that you are probably about to look at something that was made up just to get you to buy it or read it. Ironically, a lot of the stuff out there that makes these ridiculous claims offer no value and leave you feeling taken advantage of.
My boyfriend is negative, accuses me of things, tells me things like “can’t make a hoe a housewife”. He never admits he’s wrong. He can’t accept the fact that I don’t talk to people I used to like. The ones I do talk to are not a threat. Only recently has there been one – and this is after him accusing and accusing me of things from lying to always hiding shit from him. And for these reasons.. I no longer want him in my life. I am done with it.
Hi. I dated this guy last year , but unfortunately it didn’t work out between us cause I was unreachable and shy. We pretty much texted the whole time and met a few times. I fell for him and he said he had feelings for me too . But all of a sudden he wanted to be just friends. We had 5 months long an emotional relationship/friendship and 5 months a non-emotional one. I kinda acted out there. He started giving me less atttetion day after day and we started fighting every now and then and I got super jealous when he talked about this other girl he liked. Eventually he called the friendship off. I asked him to block my number and social accounts so we wouldn’t have contact . It’s been 4 months now and I miss him everyday. I’m madly in love with him . Haven’t heard of him for 4 months and I want him back. I can’t get over him being gone from my life. Please help. What should I do ? Why am I feeling this way.
My ex and I have been together for 4 years(live together since year 2 and still living together), long story short he broke up with me the beginning of October. During that month I didn’t come home but slept at my moms place. He called me sometime the middle of October and asked how I was doing. And told me how he wasn’t feeling good so I said this was what he wanted and he said he thought that was what he wanted. At the time i didn’t know about the No Contact so I made a mistake for picking his call. We would text back and forth and it seemed like everythingwas back to normal. Around November I stopped by our place and he was there..we hooked up 3 times and that was when he decided to stopped sleeping there. He would stayed at his parents or friends place, and that’s when we rarely seen each other or texting. Throughout the months he’d stopped by our place sometimes to get his stuff or shower then left. Sometimes he’d fold the blanket and fixed the bed when I didn’t have time to do that morning. It wasn’t till 2 weeks ago that night he suddenly came back. I was sleeping and heard the door opened. We talked he asked about my day work like how he normally does and I asked about his. Then he started saying “you can tell that i stopped by sometimes right(ie. fold the blankets)?” Also said coming back looking at this place made him feel sad that was why he doesn’t want to stay there long. I don’t remember specifically how it happened but we started talking about the past and he had an emotional breakdown and teared up. Saying how bad I mistreated him when he was there for me, supporting me and helping me financially(I told him about my debt) and physically because when we were together I didn’t have to pay for anything. He paid for rent, food and when we go out too. My needs and happiness goes first before his. But I wasn’t there for him leaving him at home alone most of the time when I was at my moms.” I know I was wrong and I apologized to him and hugged him. He said not to worry about him and to let him stay and think(I didn’t asked what he meant by that). The next night we talked more. At night I pretended to be deep asleep and touched his hair and put my hand on his chest. I guess that action made him feeling uncomfortable and didnt come home the following night. Weekend we do our own things and didnt see each other until the following weekday. He told me about having a talked with one of his bestfriends on sunday and that his friend suggested him seeking counseling. He told me about his struggles at work too. I dont know what got into me but at night i wanted to cuddle with him like how we used to but he pulled away saying he can’t at this time, that was when I thought about moving out. We didnt see each other the rest of that week. I texted him on friday saying I found a place and will be checking it out sunday afternoon. It was then around sunday evening when I got a text from a friend saying she ran into my ex at a tofu place with a girl, that was when I know why he been acting the way he did. I didnt asked him until monday night when we see each other again at our place. He told me that he just got back from his parents place. It seemed like they had an argument. He always wanted to move into a bigger place an apartment (even when we were together but i couldn’t help him cus of my financial) and seemed like none of his siblings can move in with him. He told his mom if only she didn’t kicked him out that year and that he has to find a place none of this would’ve happened he wouldn’t be in this situation and that hes not in debt(I guess eventho his salary wasn’t enuf for us he found other ways to do it). He was willing to pay rent but she still wanted him to move. He reminded her about her asking me to help him find a place. That was when we decided to moved in together and thats when he asked my moms permission for us to move in together when originally he was supposed to live by himself. He told her about the diamond ring that he helped me pay(my mom wanted to get me a diamond ring to have as a gift from her and he helped out by paying $700, after we broke up I wanted to give him back his money so I sold the diamond back but he didn’t take it.) but he didnt take back the money and she called him stupid for not taking the money. He said he thought that was the right thing to do at the time and he did it because of love. Long story short he got mad and left and started screaming in his car(that was what i was told). Then I started asking him about the girl. He admitted it. He said they been dating since March and shes kinda young. He said sometimes when he did something and her respond wasnt what he thought. When they started texting and the things they do or places they go reminded him of me and he doesn’t know if what he was doing was right. He asked me if I’ve been seeing anyone. I told him the truth that I had and that was last March also and we dated for a month, but it didnt work out because I was like him doing things reminded me of him so I ended it. I told him about me seeking relationship coaching and how the coach said our relationship was lack of communication and he agreed. He said I rarely communicate with him or tell him my feelings and thoughts and waited until it builds up and take it on him, and we started talking about the past. I ended the conversation early and wanted to sleep but truth is I was hurt inside knowing he is with someone. The next morning when I was getting ready for work he was awake and wishing me to drive safely(this I havent heard in a long time after we brokeup). The next night I was in bed and he came home. He asked how my day was. Then he asked if I was hurt about the news. I said no. He said he can feel it because he knows how I am even when we were together he didn’t talk to his friends that are girls because he knew I don’t like it and that hurting me was the last thing he wanted to do. That was the reason why he didn’t want to tell me. He asked me about the guy I told him about last night and asked if I’m seeing anybody else. I said no. Just hanging out with friends. He also asked if the reason I reached to relationship coaching was because after I found out about the girl, I told him no it was before. Then we ended up talking about the past…AGAIN. How he got his ways just to make me happy and taking care of me, supporting me. He knows I’ve done a lot for him in the beginning of our relationship that was why he always wanted to do more for me later on in our relationship when he got a good job. Loving and caring for me. Doing all the things for me and buying me expensive things. Supporting me financially so that I can only concentrate on paying my bills, he been doing everything for 2 years but I haven’t shown any signs of improvement. He sometimes sees me buying stuff. And I sometimes got mad at him for spending time with his family or siblings. He said that was part of the reason why he was never at his parents place for too long and that he’d be home early waiting for me. The last fight we had was because of him coming home late from having dinner with his brother. I got mad and wrote him long text, saying if hanging out with his sibling and pokemon go is more important to him then we shouldn’t be together(he recalled the incident). That was when he snapped and broke up with me. He asked how could I say that? I know i was wrong. My temper has got into me and saying things that I shouldn’t have. He also said if only I had concentrated more into our relationship than his family then it would’ve been better, but I wasn’t at the time when we were together. I hold grudges against his family and stopped visiting them eventhough he once told me he’s family oriented.
Would if children were involved??????÷!!! EVEN AS CLOSE FRIENDS FOR A COUPLE Of YEARS!!! Four children involved…..one mine, three his. My daughter and his daughter in same school and class. Last time I heard from him waS a text messge New Years Eve….told me he was still working. The guy is 47…..it sucks for me….but my child wants to know what happened to him….and wants to play with his daughter. Not only that…his daughter and my daughter taLk in class and tell each other they want to play.
It has ended here and I am just dying to find a solution to all this mess I have created with my clumsiness. I have a gift I made for him that i carried around with me since January 6 because we never knew when we would be able to meet. I had this idea to send it to him with a note “this is yours, made on January 6th. There is no point for me to keep it anymore.” But I am not sure what kind of message it will send because I am not even able to guess the most probable reason of all this behavior. He is the nice guy type, who gives and asks for affection. He would just keep hugging and holding my hand when i am around. But would not realise he missed me until we meet again (he said that). He lives with his sister and is very close to her and to his parents who live in another city. Whenever he did something careless he knows but does not say it. Instead he would become a bit more talkative about details of what he is doing or something.. until I mention it, then once faced with it he apologises. We are 29 and 31 years old and have been together for 4 months, during which he said “I love you” mederately and only at the right moments.
hello! well i ve read this article and i want to share my story also. I met this guy online and we "clicked" immediately. we 've been texting-videocalling all the time and he told me from the beginning he was looking for sth serious etc. He called all the time and texted A LOT. we werent in a relationship since we haven't met yet but we promised to meet in 4 months from now. the thing is he became a lot more distant this week. he doesn't call or text as often. dont get me wrong he still does but if he sent 20 messages a day now he sends 5 . maybe he got scared because i am kind of clingy sometimes but at the beginning he seemed to not bother at all. i like him so much and i am afraid he might bail on me . what should i do? as far as i know asking him is not a good idea right?
I have refused to be in the types of relationships you mentioned where you have better to leave your boyfriend. The result is being single for almost all my life up to this day. I don’t regret losing those relationships, and none of those guys are married today. Just jumping from a relationship to another. One of them took a girlfriend only to have someone around and guess what? He decided to leave the country without informing her! On the other hand, there have been guys I tried my best to be open with. It felt good, but they didn’t… Read more »
Natalie, I have just seen your text, I am not sure how it went since December but the best to do in this case (always), I know that it`s really hard, because you can`t focus on something else but him. You have to disappear, so he will release you are not taken for granted to him. Men can say anything but they get crazy about when the women is doing the same thing or even worst :). He has too feel that he missing you, and beside that focus on your own life and on yourself, the happiness should come from yourself and not from him or any other person. Just step back and see what happens, he will be eager to be the same as before believe me ;) and success!
I met this guy just 2 weeks ago and he was my dream come through….He is everything I needed In a man,he calls 5:30am everyday for the first week,and changed after we both had sex after our second date,now I will call him to tell him he has changed he keeps on saying he is busy…..Although he is the busy type ,but am just a little bit confused,was it the sex we had that got him pulled away, or his he really busy?each time I call him he will tell me he is going through some hard times now that we will talk wen things gets settled?should I stop calling him or still continue to call him?
Act on your issues immediately. It is not enough to simply talk about your issues together. You need to do something to address them. Once you’ve figured out what is wrong between you, each one of you should come up with at least 2 things that you are going to do to address the issues. Tell your partner your solutions and ask them to hold you accountable– the only way to mend a broken relationship is to commit to healing it.
My boyfriend broke up with me over a month ago. He won't answer my calls or texts and blocked me on Facebook. I am trying so hard to stop contacting him via text but it's hard because we talked everyday for six months. I cry and miss him terribly and he won't talk to me. I am trying to hard to do the 30 day no contact rule. my email is firstname.lastname@example.org
Guys are going to naturally cycle between wanting intimacy and wanting independence. Trying to guess the reason is impossible – some guys want space to reflect on the relationship, some more insecure guys may even want space because their friends make fun of them for being “too whipped”, some guys want space because they need time alone to clear their heads and gain clarity in life. Maybe hes struggling with a personal issue, or with his work. The reason could be anything for a multitude of different reasons.
It’s easy to hurt your chances of ‘’ACTUALLY’’ getting your ex back if you do not have a plan to follow or the correct guidance, not to worry though, that’s what I’m here for. After a breakup, most people are often hurt, confused and emotionally drained. These are all common feelings that any human will go through when releasing a loved or dear one and especially when you feel that you have to stay away, which is not always the case. Playing your cards correctly from the beginning gives you a huge advantage. Make sure you have some sort of actual plan. Receiving good advice and tips from others always helps clear confusion and helps give you a sense of direction. Sometimes you need an outsiders perspective on things to see things from a different point of view.
So my situation is a bit complicated. I was in this relationship for 3 years and 7 months. I broke up with him 8 months ago because I just couldn’t do it anymore. We were both hurting each other. After the break up we were always contacting each other. We tried to get back together multiple times, we talked about our new relationships and he seems to love the new girl. I spent a week at his house and I got pregnant. Now I’m four months pregnant and he knows because I told him. It’s now been about 9 months since the break up and I’m trying to get back with him. Lately we talk alot mostly about the baby and me trying to get him back. But he has no trust in me and says he can’t trust me ever again. What do you think?
I honestly think that it’s Bill to say its natural for a man to pull away. Ladies if this is a continuing behavior, pout your foot down, thou don’t deserve to be treated like a doormat for him to wipe his get on when he feels comfortable. This way of thinking is saying that its acceptable behavior and we should coddle tnen when they decide to cone around… This is ridiculous and we’re living in a new she of sissyfied men. If I want to coddle something I’ll grab my cat. Step into this mellinium please and stop making men the victims of their selfish behaviors its sickening! Men aren’t children and shouldn’t be treated as such. If they want the relationship they’re in, if not pack sand, have a great life and good luck finding a woman who will out up with that behavior these days.
Deal lauren. I am a fan of mars and venus books and i have all the collection. I also recommended the books to my friends. But i still need your advice , my bf broke up with me 4 months ago. he felt overwhelmed, asked space and said he has nothing to say other than he needs to be alone. Since than i tried everything includinf suggesting to be friends and told him im over the break up and want my friend back. We work together, we were close friends for 6 months and we dated for 4 months. So after the friendship speech, he panicked and ended the conversation by saying lets keep it simple and move on. So i decided to start a true limited contact ( since i hv to work with him daily), since than he called once for work purpose (i think) but didnt answer him, he asked once how i was doing ( i replied im gd only) he tried a few jokes, and we met at a friends wedding so he invited me to dance with our other friends but i declined. I am commited to NC. He also invited me for a coffee at the work coffee shop and touched my hand once. My reactions were simple and didnt show attention or neediness. Than suddenly he went distant again and start ignoring me all over again. Im completly lost. I thought he starts to get closer!!!Please advice. Thank you ...
My vibe was affected by stress of school and radiated out into other areas of my life without my realizing…granted my ex never communicated how I was making him feel, but the breakup made me realize what had happened and how i can get those stress levels down and vibe up…I am prepared it is too late…he will never be able to share those vibes. But if he doesn’t hes also missing out because I feel good, a little sad it didn’t work out, but good overall.
Hi Lauren, I've been wrestling with this with family and friends and thought maybe someone else online could help.Here's my situation. I have known my fiance for over a year, we met online and have visited each other many times. I've flown over to ireland three to four times for weeks at a time and she had visited the US for six weeks to try it out in february and for the fiance visa for six weeks in July-Sept. We would talk everyday for four to five hours a night while we were apart. She is very close to her family and loves her country. She believes Ireland is the best thing since refried beans. My plan was for her to Move to the US and we could live there while she could visit ireland for two to three months every year with the future kids for summer and christmas and then we'd move to ireland for good when I retired since I'm the bread winner and my specified job is in america (I'm a petroleum Engineer). However she back peddled and said she doesn't think what we had is strong enough to leave her family. So she came up with a five year plan. When she moved to the US for five years then we have to move back to ireland and find work there. I really loved her to i agreed to the promise. Well while she was over in the US for the fiance visa she started getting really homesick. A week or so before the wedding she said she realized why she had doubts about the marriage and that was that she loved me but wasn't "in love with me" and that I should treat her more like a lover instead of a friend. But to not worry about it and we can work on it. The next night she popped the question. "If i wanted to go back to ireland in a year will you go with me?" I said no. "what about after five years to raise our kids?" I sighed and just said no. She called off the wedding and cried alot. I should have said something other than no. Like, yes that's our plan. Or we'll do what's best for our fam...
It was stupid of me to get into this situation in the first place but it started out with me thinking with the wrong head and then those feelings gradually made there way up to my heart and now I feel heartbroken. I know I said that in the beginning I really didn’t feel like I could have anything serious with this girl but now that I am feeling so heartbroken and miserable about her dating someone else….. If she would call me right now and tell me she would give me a chance for something real between us….I would definitely take it.
Funding for this project was provided by the United States Department of Health Services, Administration for Children and Families, Grant 90-FE-0123. Any opinions, finding, and conclusions or recommendations expressed in this material are those of the author(s) and do not necessarily reflect the views of the United States Department of Health and Human Servies, Administration for Children and Families.
Starting last week, she began to stop texting me and she would not respond to any of my offers to speak over the phone. My first response to this was to let it go for a couple of days. Then, I wrote her a kind letter (not discussing our issues) and mailed it to her (trying something new to keep the relationship interesting). When she received the letter in the mail, she responded, saying she would send me a note back.
I’m kind of having the same problem but I’ve given him like 3 months of space should I keep waiting I want to waste all my time waiting on him but I really really like him even lives in Canada and I live in FL we wanted to make it work and eventually move closer to where the other is but then after a very close father figure passed away he started distancing himself more and more we’ve known eachother for 3 almost 4 years :(